Monday, March 9, 2009

Tick. Tock.

Tomorrow, the fifth grade is walking the plank. Sink or swim, babies. Ready or not, here it comes. It's knocking on your door. It's time to get the facts. Girls in here with the lovely nurse and me, boys over there with the science teacher and Mr. M. That's right, sugars - we're watching it. Eyes open or eyes shut, it'll be playing for you on a big ol' screen. It's the...wait for it...yup....you guessed it...the PUBERTY MOVIE!!

shriek.


giggle.


squeal.


peeking through open fingers placed dramatically over eyes.


listening intently.


what the?!?!?


imagining opposite sex in the other room learning all THIS STUFF about what is going on with this body of mine. NO! They can't know this about me!!!

glance at friends. Resume cool composure. Make the decision.


No thanks. I'm going to have to pass on all this. I'm not really interested in having it happen to me. Nah. I'll just stay put, kay? Yeah, um...no thanks.


That's just weird anyway.

16 comments:

Sue said...

Ugh. The loss of innocence in 5th grade! Poor, poor kids!

smiles4u said...

Oh what fun! There lives will never be the same. I would love to be a little mouse in the bathroom or recess afterwards!

justlori2day said...

Crap - that happens in 5th grade? That means my daughter must be seeing it soon!

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!

GL BTW!

Kari said...

I remember THAT day, way back when... oh so clearly.

I also remember reading through that book, "Our Bodies, Ourselves" with my girlfriends, giggling the whole time.

Ah, youth.

bernthis said...

I STILL remember that day. Yikes!

patty said...

A common theme here: I remember it like it was yesterday.

Dana's Brain said...

Oh my. Good luck with that one! I think I still bear some residual scars!

Jen W said...

I would love to be a fly on the wall to watch their reactions. I'm sure they are hysterical!

Lee of MWOB said...

5th grade??? I didn't get the movie until 8th and my kids are NEVER getting the movie.

Just kidding. I know they will - I just don't like to think about it too much. :-)

Zip n Tizzy said...

One of the problems with moving so much was that the school I went to in 6th grade showed the movie to 7th graders, but the school I went to in 7th grade had already shown it to the 6th graders.

I MISSED THE MOVIE! And there were no make-ups.

Technically it didn't matter since my mom believed in the explain when they ask book of parenting. But come on. When I was 4, I wasn't nearly as curious and when I was 11, I was done asking.

Laggin said...

Wait. Wait. WAIT!!! Where did you say I am going to grow hair?

anymommy said...

I remember sitting in this class. What was that, like 100 years ago? Wow.

Carolyn...Online said...

It IS weird. Too bad it's real.

scarletvirago said...

Better to have a giggling, reluctant kid than one who tries to lead the class. Sometimes I think my no-nonsense approach to parenting could use a little nonsense.

Vodka Mom said...

I used to teach that!!!!!!

I loved it!! I have TONS of stories from those days. I'll have to dig them out.

xoxox

Ms Picket To You said...

do you remember cringing even in HS when we'd have to suffer those sex talks? lordy. i am still blushing.

also: please come over and give Bridget the talk. thank you.