Tomorrow, the fifth grade is walking the plank. Sink or swim, babies. Ready or not, here it comes. It's knocking on your door. It's time to get the facts. Girls in here with the lovely nurse and me, boys over there with the science teacher and Mr. M. That's right, sugars - we're watching it. Eyes open or eyes shut, it'll be playing for you on a big ol' screen. It's the...wait for it...yup....you guessed it...the PUBERTY MOVIE!!
peeking through open fingers placed dramatically over eyes.
imagining opposite sex in the other room learning all THIS STUFF about what is going on with this body of mine. NO! They can't know this about me!!!
glance at friends. Resume cool composure. Make the decision.
No thanks. I'm going to have to pass on all this. I'm not really interested in having it happen to me. Nah. I'll just stay put, kay? Yeah, um...no thanks.
That's just weird anyway.
Murders and puppies and failed selfies.
15 hours ago