Sunday, March 29, 2009

The More You Say Goodbye I say Hello.

It's back to work tomorrow. Our two weeks of vacation come to a close when the alarm wakes us at 5:40 tomorrow morning. Goodbye sleeping in. Goodbye Jamaican tan skin and No Problem, Mon attitude. Goodbye mid-day Trivial Persuit games. Goodbye Twilight series. I'll miss you, Edward Cullen. Goodbye obsessive searching for a puppy. Goodbye calm, flexible, relaxed mom who laughs more than she grumbles. Goodbye.

Hello 37 biographies that need to be graded. Hello dear, enthusiastic 5th graders who want to share all of their adventures. Hello Three Cups of Tea - Young Reader's Edition. Hello electric pencil sharpener interrupting me - how I've missed you! Hello new job addition as a lacrosse coach after school every day. Hello making lunches at 6:00 am. Hello parents who need help understanding that their child's behavior, while markedly different from that of a 9 or 10 year old, is really normal for an 11 year old. Hello fellow teachers, most of whom I respect and love, some of whom should have retired long ago. Hello too much coffee and not enough water. Hello.

Would I trade it? Probably not, but I sure do love my time away. When things are finite they are crystalized and oh so sweet.

Thursday, March 26, 2009

She Said / She Said

We were in Jamaica for seven heavenly nights last week. We were so happy. We were doing a good job breathing. And sleeping. And laughing from our bellies.

On our way back to the airport in Montego Bay, I found myself engaging in a heated debate with Myself. It went something like this:

Self One: What the hell are you talking about? Of course you can't just STAY in Jamaica forever. You have things to take care of!

Self Two: I think I'm going to make a break for it. I could wait tables at the resort. Work the front desk. I don't need anything I've got back home. Home is BORING. There's more to life, and I think it's right here at Beaches Negril. The family could visit me from time to time. I think I'm going to do it. (Gets up to ask driver to pull over)

Self One: (Tackling Self One and throwing her back in her seat) You wouldn't last five minutes on this island by yourself. Sit down and stop being ridiculous.

Self Two: Is that a DARE? Cuz I'm pretty competitive you know. And I'm fairly sure you're underestimating me. Say the word if it's a dare, you coward! (mutters) You were always terrified of anything exciting.

Self One: Did you just call me a COWARD, you reckless commitment phobic dreamer? Come back to Earth, honey! We have bills to pay, children to raise, commitments to honor. It's just like you to be so selfish.

Self Two: And it's just like you to be so disgustingly PREDICTABLE! I'd rather put salt in my eyeballs than hang out and talk to boring old you! Watch and weep, sister. I'm going in! (To bus driver) Excuse me...sir? Would you mind...

Self One: (still to driver) ...explaining to me what that building is used for? Molasses refinery? Ah ha! Very interesting. Thank you, sir.

Self Two: I'll get you for that. You just wait.

And so on. Self One won, obviously, but Self Two is not a gracious loser, so I do believe there's more to come from her.

Meanwhile, back in my real life, the crocuses are up. They are doing their part to try to restore my love for this town which lies so very far north of the equator.

Monday, March 9, 2009

Tick. Tock.

Tomorrow, the fifth grade is walking the plank. Sink or swim, babies. Ready or not, here it comes. It's knocking on your door. It's time to get the facts. Girls in here with the lovely nurse and me, boys over there with the science teacher and Mr. M. That's right, sugars - we're watching it. Eyes open or eyes shut, it'll be playing for you on a big ol' screen. It's the...wait for guessed it...the PUBERTY MOVIE!!




peeking through open fingers placed dramatically over eyes.

listening intently.

what the?!?!?

imagining opposite sex in the other room learning all THIS STUFF about what is going on with this body of mine. NO! They can't know this about me!!!

glance at friends. Resume cool composure. Make the decision.

No thanks. I'm going to have to pass on all this. I'm not really interested in having it happen to me. Nah. I'll just stay put, kay? Yeah, thanks.

That's just weird anyway.